Saying goodbye to those we love isn't easy.
Having just done so, I miss my friends and
family back in Montana. However in truth
I feel at home here in Manhattan. Hence
I've spent the past weeks reconnecting with
long lost lovers. Don't worry, I mean dear
old friends rather than former roue' alliances.
However I do love those I call my friends.
Especially the ones who have stood by me
through thick and thin. As living creatures,
each of us are constantly evolving. And if
nothing else, my almost three year hiatus
in Montana absolutely proves just that.
I've no doubt that I'm a different guy than the
gent who exited this isle back then. In truth
I was damaged goods. Hence while blessed to
float to Montana via my golden parachute, I
was half the man I am today. The corporate
world almost killed me. Hence I was pooped,
jaded, and ready to retreat. My subsequent
sojourn way out west was quite restorative.
It provided the time and place to rethink
just about everything. Therefore upon my
return I'm better for said refresher course in
adult education. And fortunately, I'm now
a much happier man because of it.
All of which proves that one can't necessarily
pick up exactly where they left of. Within the
continuum of our lives we naturally move on.
Well, most of us. Returning to the scene of
many crimes, it's reassuring to reconnect with
those who know us best. Some of my nearest
and dearest haven't changed a bit. Others have
moved on to bigger and better things. And a
few seem to have been unable to change the
errors of their ways. Honestly, none of their
circumstances make a difference. Thankfully
my evolved perspective seems to have both
altered my view of my friends and... myself.
Honestly, I've no allusions of now becoming
the Yogi of Central Park South. However as
I reconnect face-to-face with all who I care
about, I'm reminded of just how far we've all
come. And... how far we still have to go. And
while somewhat sobering, it's also inspiring.
That's because while it's rather tough to alter
the course of our on-going sagas, we each can
change the way we react to life's challenges.
Shifting one's natural reflexes isn't as easy as
it sounds. Yet some of us get to a better place
by facing the demons within. And embracing
our individual strengths and weaknesses.
None of us have all of the answers. However
slowly but surely we each discover our way
to embrace our reality. That's where my head
has been since May of 2014 and I'm better
for it. Along the way I rejected organized
religion yet somehow found the light within.
Not an inner glow but instead a clear head
post elimination of self-inflicted burdens.
Today I see my world in a different light.
I've accepted what I can or cannot do. And
with such resignation comes such a sense of
empowerment, freedom, and bliss. I am who
I am. It is what it is. So why fight fate?
I no longer worry that I'll fall back into my
old ways. Whether my change of heart is
because I'm older and wiser or... bigger
(literally) and better is of no consequence.
The difference is that I'm much more self
aware. Embracing one's limitations may
be the key to fulfillment. Hence I'm very
happy with things just as they are. And
after a long hiatus I'm loving all of my
"new" old friends for who they are. Thus
in my opinion you can go home. A return
engagement is not only illuminating but
more than worth a trip back to bountiful.
